Re-Branded; Russell Brand The IIlluminated Christ Or Globalist Fool For Hire? The Birth Chart Deconstructed

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Robert Phoenix

Robert Phoenix

journalist, blogger, interviewer, astrologer & psychic medium


I’m going to be the guy that pisses in the marshmallow bonfire down by the seaside. Yes, I’m going to take a hard look at a the Russell Brand, brand. He of the mesmerizing, Charlie Manson gaze, the rapier wit and the “fuck you” fashion, almost always adorned with some form of vaguely religious accessorizing. Brand is hitting the big time. He’s a got a bloodline babe on his arm (Jemima Goldsmith) is guest editing “The New Statesman” and is calling for “Revolution.” People are swooning over his grinning broadsides against the establishment. He makes peroxide blonde CNN presenters wet their panties and old guard talking heads like Jeremy Paxman have to jump through his flaming hoops of puckish disregard. We’ll be looking at Brand’s chart and it’s loaded with celestial technology that is clearly the back end of Brand’s, red hot star turn and provided he can make it through the next few months, it will go from shining to blazing. But the question arises, that even if someone has the starry cred at their disposal, does that give them the license or the divine right to distribute their will if it serves an agenda? And even if that’s the case, could they be in the employ of those that clearly understand the power of the chart and key transits at pivotal times in history? In essence, could someone be guiding and exploiting those aspects towards their own end? And would someone like Brand, not only not give a shit, but also embrace it fully, with their own permission? Perhaps by the end of this piece, we’ll find out.


I remember the first time I saw Brand, it was on MTV. He was hosting an awards show and quite frankly, the only person I thought was as unfunny in a similar role, was Pauly Shore, the dopey, stoner son of Mitzi Shore who somehow managed to convince an entire generation, for just a few, short years, that he was hilarious. Well, you had to get to your 8th or 9th bong load for that level to kick in, because outside of the glazed eyes, Big Mac sauce drooling down your chin set, he wasn’t funny–at all. Brand was a close second.

But somehow, over time, just like how maybe David Koresh went from being a bumbling apprentice to Benjamin Roden, The Branch Davidian daddy, to a fire-breathing, chapter and verse quoting gospel machine, Brand got his chops and evolved into his current persona.

Films like “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” and “Get Me To The Greek” cemented his image in the mind’s eye as a rock star. His claims that he’s fucked nine-women-a-day casts an alpha programming spell over other men and don’t think that women don’t pay attention either.

It’s interesting to chart Brand over the years. His early photos reveal a soft, chubby faced, English lad who claims that he was sexually abused and like many of his Pluto in Libra mates, he suffered from the chaos and fracture of a divorce. Brand claims that his addiction (drugs) can be tied to this phase of his life. Brand’s father is pictured here, heading out of a pub with the late, Amy Winehouse. Ironically, he looks a lot like the guy on his right, Keith Hudson, who is Katy Perry’s father. Hudson is a sort of new-age, Christian preacher, who claims to be a chosen prophet for the end times. He also happens to be a Gemini, just like Brand.

One of the claims of hardcore Christians, is that Satanists and Masons use the Church as a sort of limited hang which gives them superficial legitimacy. As a result, Hudson has been accused by that community of being a false prophet.

Brand went to the famed Italia-Conti Academy of Theater Arts in London. People like Patsy Kensit, Gabriel Anwar, Sadie Frost, Tracey Ullman and Julliana Hough attended there as well. Hough is interesting because she was raised in Utah as a Mormon and not just her, but all of her brothers attended the academy. She left after a year, where according to her, she was “abused, mentally, physically, everything.” She starred in “Rock of Ages” with Brand and is set to star in an upcoming film, also with him called, “Diablo Cody.”

Brand’s physicality has morphed and evolved along with his persona. Here’s an early picture of him, circa 2006 and version 2.0. Some plastic surgeons have noted that Brand has undergone Rhinoplasty, which gives him a slightly bulging, quasi, Cro-Magnon Christ look, with a hint of Jim Morrison (shades only) and the buggy eyes of Charlie Manson. Do you know what’s funny about Charlie Manson? When he first gathered his family members from the human lost and found in Haight Ashbury, circa 1967, he told them that the key to really breaking free was to strip themselves of their conditioning, to go beyond their social programming and shatter the institutional chains that had held them back. Once they did, they could truly be themselves and unlike the rest of the squares, be free.

Forty-years-later, Manson’s rap would’ve gotten a book deal and a spot on Oprah’s couch. Brand, like Manson is calling for “revolution.” There’s even a Beatles connection (of course). Manson’s sonic bible was “The White Album” released on 11/22/68 (Five-year-Kennedy death anniversary). It’s loaded with all kinds of hooks and triggers and Manson took his cues from McCartney’s “Helter Skelter” and Lennon’s “Revolution 1” and “Revolution 9.”

At the closing ceremonies of the occult olympics in London, Brand was dressed as Willy Wonka. This is a theme not uncommon to him, as he has also donned the garb of the child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang-Bang, a book written Ian Fleming, yes, that Ian Fleming, who also happened to be one of L. Ron Hubbard’s pals. But I digress just slightly. Brand has a bit of the pied piper in him and he’s playing “Eve of Destruction” on his magic flute.

He sat atop a funky-yellow school bus (Magical Mystery Tour) and sang, “I Am The Walrus” (Lennon). And now Brand is channeling the ghost of Lennon with his situationist rants and screeds, holding a mirror up to the establishment in the same spirit of irreverence that Lennon did. This is not a coincidence and we’ll get into this later as we dissect his chart.

Brand met Katy Perry, first on the set of “Get Me To The Greek” and then again at the 2009 VMA’s, which he hosted. Perry and Joe Perry of Aerosmith performed “We Will Rock You.” The Perry/Perry pairing is yet another Gemini
hyper-meme. The track ends with Katy, not Joe falling at Brand’s feet. From there it was flesh time in Thailand, Paris and India, where Brand popped the question. There have been whispers that Brand was her handler. If you are not familiar with the term “handler” it’s used not just in spy circles, but also when MK Ultra is mentioned.

MK Ultra is a well known mind control program that was practiced by the CIA. It involved a number of methods to crack a person open and get them to do things that would be against their will. Jason Bourne is just one, popular example.

In the late-nineties, early two-thousands, there was a rush of material from women that claimed to have been tortured and repeatedly shown bits and pieces of “The Wizard Of Oz” or “Cinderella” or “Snow White.” Kathy O’Brien, Arizona Wilder and Svali shredded the veil over the topic with accounts that were as nauseating as they were wild. Through trauma and torture, they had their brains compartmentalized and in those personal voids, new personalities were programmed, triggered on demand by keywords with phrases from the fairytale that included their access codes. “The Stepford Wives” written by Ira Levin (Rosemary’s Baby) was a contemporary allegory for this type of programming.

Katy Perry’s name has been associated with the same type of programming confessed by Kathy O’Brien and the others. There is a video on youtube, which shows Brand and Perry on the red carpet and Brand flashes Shepard Fairey’s “Obey” image with a neat pentagram and Perry seems to go into some type of goofy trance.

Brand divorced Perry but wasted no time by dating Perry lookalike, Zooey Deschanel. Again, we have a Gemini theme in action, twins/split personality/duality/polarization. Last year he was with Alesandra Balasz, the stepdaughter of Chelsea “Handler.” Daddy Balasz belongs to the “Quill and Dagger,” Cornell’s equivalent to Skull and Bones. He’s also a massive influence peddler, rubbing shoulders with Madonna, Gaga, and other plugged in Gothamites.

Being that Brand has Uranus squaring Venus, relationships last about as long as the mating cycle of a mayfly. With Venus tied to, yoked to Saturn, we see again, the need, either unconscious or realized for relationship to provide some kind of cover, power. structure and form. Even though he has Saturn in Cancer (fall) Saturn still performs the function of escalation with it’s need to position itself towards the accumulation of form and power. His latest “relationship” with Jemima Goldsmith is yet another example of this in action, another cagey move up the ladder, emotionally ascending, one-step-at-a-time, up the social pyramid.

Jemima is the daughter of Sir Jimmy Goldsmith, a robber baron of the first order, who inherited a fortune from his father, Franck Adolphe Benedict Goldschmidt. Papa Franck was one of the founders of the “King David” hotel, which was bombed by Irgun and became the catalyst for the transfer of British mandate Palestine, to David Ben-Gurion and the Zionist congress, leading to the nation state of Israel.

Jemima is an editor for The New Statesman and fits into the Saturn/Venus upscaling model of trending upwards in relationship in Brand’s life/chart. She was hand-in-glove with Russell’s star turn as the editor of “The New Statesman.” With his editorial piece in place, Brand had bonafides across the board.

A poster on FB claimed that he is a Trojan Horse. The most popular scenatrio is that he has succeeded in slipping beyond the guardians of the establishment, but I would offer that it’s the other way around. I believe that it’s the alternative community that Brand has infiltrated and not vice versa. With his Sun/Merc in Gemini, Brand holds a mirror up to the world and with the Sun/Neptune opposition, the world sees what it wants or perhaps what Brand himself wants the world to see.


My friend, RA DA’COSMOPHYXIAN has clued me into the power of the rectification as it relates to to the birth chart. Now Ra and I might disagree on the frequency of rectification, but I agree, that in certain cases, even when the birth time is known, that it might behoove a closer look. Brand is said to have been born at midnight on 6/4/75. This is slightly suspect to me as rarely, in all the years I have been doing charts, I have seldom seen a birth exactly at the top of the hour. Not saying it can’t happen, it just doesn’t fly with any sort of frequency. In fact, in the hustle and bustle of birth, there can at times be a rounding off of the birth time. So there’s a possibility that Brand was born either just before or just after midnight, I’m getting 12:03 AM, which would put him at 27 Cap, ASC., I originally thought he was at 29 degrees, but that would have put his birth time out to around 12:08, thus pushing it closer to 12:10, which would have generally been the rounded off number. 27 degrees on the DSC also fits, because that’s where his tortured Venus resides. In astrology, we read for the next house if a planet is within five degrees of that house. So, technically, Brand’s Venus is in the 7th, however, from a purely symbolic perspective, It’s like Venus cannot make the journey home, to where it’s accidentally exalted.

So with Cap on the ASC and his first house mostly Aquarius we see both the establishment (Capricorn) and the dawn of a new day (Aquarius); the old guard and the new wave. Lurking in Brand’s 12th is mighty Pluto in Capricorn in transit. We are talking behind the scenes power. Pluto in Cap is the rise of corporatocracy, banking and Baphomet. Having a Pluto transit in the 12th is no bullshit as it makes the individual deal with temptation and power. There are forces behind the scene at work in Brand’s life. Do they serve his best interests and the greater good, or do they feed him and his dark, occult practices, spell-binding which the likes of Katy Perry and millions more struggle to awaken from?

Remember when Brand was singing John Lennon at the olympics? This is important to note. Brand forms an unholy trinity of sorts with two, other fiery iconoclasts of British shock and raw. I’m talking Lennon and John Lydon, aka Johnny Rotten. Together, Lennon/Lydon/Brand complete the grand air trine of Libra (Lennon), Aquarius (Lydon) and Gemini (Brand). With transiting Uranus on his natal Mars, he’s on fire. Jupiter conjunct Mars in the natal chart, especially in Aries gives the individual an abundant amount of will power. One of the things that people like about him is his ability to speak his mind without having much filter and because he’s bright, it sounds both funny, insightful and legit. Most people with no or little filter can shoot their mouth off and it can get them in trouble, Brand seems to have remedied this by having the lightning fast trine from Mercury to Uranus. He’s quick on the uptake. But Gemini also represents duality and duplicity. Is Brand really “down with the people” or as his history and associations suggest, might actually be moonlighting for the kabal as the pied piper of the revolution?

With Chiron in Aries in the 2nd House, I’d say that Brand’s well publicized appetite for the ladies can be seen here. Chiron in Aries in the second reeks of over compensation. Remember, Brand has a history of abuse and based on that Chiron, I’m betting that it’s not the hot babysitter that wanted to initiate him into the joy of sex. Aries = the male principle. Is his womanizing a frenzied effort to cover up and somehow reinforce some male part of himself that manifests as the chronic wound? I’m sure he would have some glib comment at the ready, but it’s just a notice in the chart.

Another notice is that Brand has no Earth in his chart, other than his CAP ASC. He isn’t grounded at all and is in someways, the embodiment of the magical puer.

Revolutions are not always in the best interests of the people. The Bolshevik Revolution was a bloody affair and the accounts of what took place are not for the faint of heart. Orthodox priests were boiled alive and their charges were forced to drink what was in essence, human soup. That’s just one, brutal scene from that incredibly macabre and chilling epoch in human history. Mother Russia was thrust into darkness, paranoia and poverty as a result.

The aristocrats of France, the one’s who had the greatest chance of dealing with the rise of the banking families like the Goldschmidts and the Rothschilds were wiped out under the hue and cry of liberte! Under the guise of change new models are slipped in, almost like a virus. I am not one for the status quo, but I am also not going to start marching behind the likes of Brand and his pal, Gemini, Daniel Pinchbeck, just because they’re cool, or funny, or outrageous, irreverent and took the right drugs. Just because one has gulped Ayahuasca, doesn’t mean their soul is clean.

But at the end of the day, Brand is a global warmer, a gun controller and yet another false prophet dealing in Tavistock in trade social schema and ideologies, just like the Fab Four and Lennon/McCarthy did in the 60’s.

Brand needs to be very careful as well in the months to come as transiting Pluto in the 12th will square his natal Mars, which will still be hot and firing with the energy of Uranus. That’s a potentially violent and deadly aspect. Is it more than just ironic that Brand resembles Che Guevara and Jesus? Will he be martyred for some greater cause? Because when we’re talking about revolution, one’s life is a small price to pay for the greater good!

If Brand makes it through the Pluto/Mars square, he’ll have Uranus conjuncting his Jupiter and the potential real, electrifying insight is there. He’ll also wind up revising much of what he believes in when Saturn moves into Sag and conjuncts his Neptune in the 10th in 2015. Perhaps then, at that point, he’ll realize that the most revolutionary thing he could do would be to cut his hair, get married, have a child and continue to shock people with an enlightened normalcy that would take real courage to literally and figuratively, recreate his brand.

5 thoughts on “Re-Branded; Russell Brand The IIlluminated Christ Or Globalist Fool For Hire? The Birth Chart Deconstructed”

  1. L

    I’ve been noticing the rise of Brand over the last several years and can’t figure it out. And now all this awakening tripe he’s pushing everywhere. I don’t know if he’s for real or not but your peice couldn’t be more timely.

  2. B

    Really good article, thanks. If you ever get a minute, check out the astrological outlook for the Lockerbie bombing. Many many planets in Capricorn, Mars at mid-heaven. It makes one wonder.


  3. T

    I hoped you’d have something to say about Russell Brand Robert. Thanks for this – though it contains some very dark thoughts.

    Brand is a Brit through and through, though he does spend time here in the US, not enough to have become ‘Murican. I do wonder it people in the USA “get” him accurately.

    Anyway, I’ll be on his side until he does something stooopid again. We need a voice like his, a voice to which younger people will pay attention. This country is so celeb-conscious; home-grown varieties here tend to ass-kiss the Dem establishment far too enthusiastically for my liking. Sickening at times. It’s refreshing to hear Brand saying what some of us have been longing to hear.

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